Half of the year had past and yet here I am tormented --- on a different level though! I tried to recall the things which have connection with the incident that suddenly transpired, to at least point out my mistake and have it corrected but unfortunately I find it doubly hard to find out where I’ve gone wrong… Believe me, I am over cautious, I usually keep myself mum and will not say a single word if I am not sure about it, simply because I don’t want to be misunderstood or rather I want to play safe… Despite being careful and very picky or choosy of words coming out of my mouth, well sorry for me because still I have put myself into trouble… Well that’s what you call tough luck I guess…
When that bad incident happened, the first thing came into my mind is to quit because I thought that’s the easiest way to do to get over it… But as days goes by, I realized that quitting is not the only solution and I have to prove them wrong. If in the past I easily quit without clearing myself well I won’t be doing that again… I won’t do a French exit this time around, I will make sure that I will be able to take back what they have taken from me --- quite intriguing eh! --- I’m not asking for payback, all I want is for them to realize their mistakes... Imagine every morning I have to face the mirror just to tell or remind myself to move on---move on---move on, ghesssh, I have to do it over and over to at least ease my heavy feeling and ready myself for the day… I don’t know how long I have to do it, but I guess I might need to practice doing it more often to make the healing fast… It’s really hard to pretend that you’re OK while the truth is you’re not, but then I have to endure covering my sad face with a happy mask…
Honestly, one of the reasons why I am staying is because I want to save a good friendship and I wish I could…
When that bad incident happened, the first thing came into my mind is to quit because I thought that’s the easiest way to do to get over it… But as days goes by, I realized that quitting is not the only solution and I have to prove them wrong. If in the past I easily quit without clearing myself well I won’t be doing that again… I won’t do a French exit this time around, I will make sure that I will be able to take back what they have taken from me --- quite intriguing eh! --- I’m not asking for payback, all I want is for them to realize their mistakes... Imagine every morning I have to face the mirror just to tell or remind myself to move on---move on---move on, ghesssh, I have to do it over and over to at least ease my heavy feeling and ready myself for the day… I don’t know how long I have to do it, but I guess I might need to practice doing it more often to make the healing fast… It’s really hard to pretend that you’re OK while the truth is you’re not, but then I have to endure covering my sad face with a happy mask…
Honestly, one of the reasons why I am staying is because I want to save a good friendship and I wish I could…

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